posted on October 5, 2020 by Arabella Kingsley

Writing the Perfect Daddy Dom

What makes the perfect Daddy Dom in a novel?  It is a question I work tirelessly on to answer in the romance novels I write as Arabella Kingsley and Cordelia Gregory.  My Daddy Dom characters are a modern twist and combination of handsome elegantly dressed classic 1940s film stars such as Cary Grant in Notorious, Gregory Peck and more daredevil action heroes like James Bond, Napoleon Solo in The Man from Uncle and even Jonathan Hart in the 1980s series Hart to Hart.  They are characters I grew up watching and fell in love with whist they romanced my favourite ice cool beautiful feisty female characters like Grace Kelly, Eve Marie-Saint, Ingrid Bergman, Katherine Hepburn and Stefanie Powers in Hitchcockian plots.  So, I have tried to come up with short definitive list of what I perceive as the top qualities and requirements for a perfect Daddy Dom, those that set him apart from just a bossy man who likes to tell the heroine what to do all the time.

  •   The perfect Daddy Dom should always be smartly dressed usually in a suit.  In my novels whether they are Billionaires, dark Mafia Bosses or spies they will wear a suit most of a time and have an athletic appearance.  This plays into establishing the character as dependable controlled intelligent authority figure in the life of the heroine as well as those around him.  Someone with self-discipline who can be relied upon in a crisis.  It also denotes his success and capability in his profession.
  •   The ideal Daddy Dom will be the ultimate protector for the heroine even if she at first finds his need to protect her annoying when she is attempting to be independent.  This will often take the form of both physical and emotional protection.  He will not be deterred by her initial rejection of his assistance and will view the heroine as a beautiful precious gift he has been given and must take care.  Someone’s needs who outweigh his own.
  • The prized Daddy Dom will act as a guide for the heroine in helping her to recognise and believe in the special qualities he has seen in her and loves.  He will safely guide her to push her own boundaries and explore her inner self, needs and desires to reveal her own uniqueness encouraging her to embrace her true self, the woman he has fallen in love with.
  • One of the most important qualities for the perfect Daddy Dom is loyalty to the heroine.  I have always viewed loyalty as a higher form of love.  People can flippantly say they love you but it can be fleeting. Loyalty is harder to achieve and even harder to acquire from another person so when it is given it is precious and never wavers.  He must never give up on her even if she resists him at first.  He must move heaven and earth to be there when she needs him, to protect and support her and always put her needs before his own even if it might just cost his own life.
  • This is arguably the most important quality a Daddy Dom must possess.  The heroine must be able to trust him in any given situation with her life and emotional well-being, in particular during lovemaking and discipline.  Once trust is broken there is no going back.

So, what do you believe makes the perfect Daddy Dom?  What makes the top of your list of qualities he must have? Enter to win a $5 Amazon gift card by answering the comment above. The best answer (favorite response) will be selected by the author.

Arabella Kingsley

Arabella Kingsley

I live in the UK, in the leafy county of Hertfordshire, just outside London with my husband, daughter and dog called Domino. I started my career as a Legal Executive and then decided to change direction and attend University to study History. It was during this time that I gave birth to my thirteen-year-old daughter. I then returned to University to complete a postgraduate degree in History. My passion is writing novels, in particular historical & action romance, gothic romance, fantasy, romantic thrillers and erotica. When I am not writing I love walking in the nearby woods connecting with nature. I am also a Spiritualist Medium and have many stories to tell about my encounters with spirits and past lives which I often translate into my writing.

8 thoughts on “Writing the Perfect Daddy Dom”

  1. Avatar Lisa Sapp says:

    I love that you look at the old movie stars for inspiration. They really are so sexy. Your list is spot on for me, except for the first. I like a well dressed man, but with the right character traits cowboys, ranchers, military and first responders have the strength of character to be wonderful daddy doms. Their line of work requires authority, strength, discipline and compassion.

    Another trait I like to see is when the daddy shows glimpses of his own vulnerability to his special love. He doesn’t share that with the public, only with his love. It takes real strength and trust to be vulnerable. So for a daddy to share this, it speaks louder than words his love and commitment.

    Please keep writing your stories. I haven’t read them all yet, but I am enjoying the journey.

    1. Avatar Arabella Kingsley says:

      Thank you. It is lovely to hear you are enjoying the books. I agree with you. There are many different types of Daddy Doms out there and when they share their vulnerability with the one they love that is very special. 🙂

  2. The perfect “Daddy Dom” would treat me as an equal yet instincttly know when I needed extra tenderness and approval. He would be kind, intelligent and trust me equally as I did him. He would also have a good sense of humor and know when to be his true self.

    1. Avatar Arabella Kingsley says:

      Yes equality is very important and I believe trust is even more essential.

  3. Avatar Donna Antonio says:

    Caring. It’s all about taking care of his loved one. Stern with a sense of humor

  4. Avatar Kayeleigh says:


    1. Avatar Arabella Kingsley says:

      Perfect. Definitely all of those. 🙂

  5. Avatar bn100 says:

    educated about the roles, communicative, understands boundaries

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