posted on September 30, 2015 by Rebecca Yarros

Writing Amid the Chaos

by Rebecca Yarros

Beyond What is GivenIf I get asked one thing about my life as author, it usually has nothing to do with writing, my characters or even my book. No, the number one question I get is, “how do you balance it all?”

It’s no secret that our lives are a hectic mess. Up until a couple years ago, I had the number one military spouse blog in the country, The Only Girl Among Boys. Our life was in the public, and usually in crazy .gif form. But then, one day shortly after receiving an offer from my publisher to purchase FULL MEASURES, DSS called, telling us that after two years of waiting, they finally had a little girl for us to foster. Everything changed. Everything. My husband was in Afghanistan on his fourth deployment, this one only nine months, thank God, and suddenly I had our four little boys at home, twenty-five hours of hockey practice a week, a new book deal, and a new baby. I remember thinking, “Insanity. This is pure insanity.” But my husband came home, we divided house responsibilities, and we made our little tribe function with a hectic precision that a military family is known for. Right around that time, we realized my blog was a liability to our role as our Little Miss’ foster parents, and I stopped writing it.

But then…well, hectic turned to almost unmanageable.

The army ordered our family to move to Fort Carson, Colorado, my hometown, where we plan to retire. But our daughter wasn’t legally free and there was zero chance that we would leave her. As my husband reluctantly moved to Colorado, the boys and I stayed here to fight for our Little Miss. With each new work opportunity that came my way, it seemed we found another special need that our Little Miss needed help with. Another doctor. Another therapist. Another month going by. Balance flew out the window. Now, seven months later, our life is a hectic, yet functioning mess as we try to determine her future this week as my latest book, BEYOND WHAT IS GIVEN, releases. I had to laugh when the dates coincided, but that’s kind of how we’ve always lived our life.

So how do I balance this gorgeous chaos? I have no earthly idea. I really wish I had this glorious answer on how to be a stellar mom and a stellar author, but I’m winging it, and some days I feel like I let each of my roles slip a wee bit too much. I do my best to triage. Whoever is out of laundry has theirs done next. Whoever has hockey practice gets there. I grocery shop when we’re out of milk, sit with our Little Miss’ therapists, spend my days working with her, talk to my husband a handful of times a day, and attempt to remember to shower. I am first and foremost a wife and mother, and I think as long as I always keep those two roles my most important, the others will fall in line. And as for looking balanced? I just do my best to compartmentalize my roles as wife/mom and author.

So when do I write? Usually at night once the kids are in bed, between about 10 pm and 2 am. Then the boys are up at 6:15 a.m., so sleep something I miss dearly. I do my promo, my publicist chats, my social media during the day, and then try to lock myself down at night. Truthfully, that kind of schedule isn’t sustainable. I write in cycles, edit in others, sleep in others.  I remind myself that it won’t always be this way, that one day we’ll live in the same house as a family, that the pace will lessen just enough to gasp a full breath.

Until then, I do the best I can, and luckily I’m married to a man who flies in when he sees me start to crumble. We have a supportive military command that gives him that freedom, I have a more-than-patient editor, and my publicist knows that my brain is on fire about ninety percent of the day. They’re my dream team. I really wish I had a magic answer to balance, heck, every mom does. But until that magic ability suddenly appears, I’ll just keep pushing everything, doing my best to not let these plates I keep spinning drop. Oh, and writing, I’ll keep that up too.


Lt. Grayson Masters is focused on graduating the Apache helicopter course, and the last thing he needs is his gorgeous new roommate Samantha Fitzgerald distracting him. While her smart mouth and free spirit are irresistibly irritating, he can’t deny their off-the-charts chemistry, no matter how hard he tries.

Having just been expelled from college, Sam has no business digging for Grayson’s secrets while she’s hiding her own, but that doesn’t stop her from trying to tear down his walls. Each barrier she busts through drops one of her own, though, and she’s not prepared for the truth: another woman laid claim to Grayson’s heart long ago.

Falling in love is something neither Grayson nor Sam can afford, and when that line is crossed and secrets are exposed, they’ll learn that sometimes it’s the answered prayers that will put you through hell. 

Rebecca Yarros

Rebecca Yarros

Rebecca Yarros is a hopeless romantic and lover of all things chocolate, coffee, and Paleo. In addition to being a mom, military wife, and blogger, she can never choose between Young Adult and New Adult fiction, so she writes both. She's a graduate of Troy University, where she studied European history and English, but still holds out hope for an acceptance letter to Hogwarts. Her blog, The Only Girl Among Boys, has been voted the Top Military Mom Blog the last two years, and celebrates the complex issues surrounding the military life she adores. When she's not writing, she's tying on hockey skates for her kids, or sneaking in some guitar time. She is madly in love with her army-aviator husband of eleven years, and they're currently stationed in Upstate NY with their gaggle of rambunctious kiddos and snoring English Bulldog, but she would always rather be home in Colorado.

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