My latest release, What Were You Thinking, Paige Taylor? is about a city girl who buys a bookstore in a small beach town in order to makeover her life, using a self help book to guide her. It’s something I’ve wanted to write about for a long time because the whole idea of reinvention fascinates me. It also explains why I’ve read my body weight in self-help books. And, over the years I’ve journaled, chanted, meditated and primal screamed, all in the name of being a better person.
And my conclusions on what works and what doesn’t?
Love.
Yup. When I think of every self-improvement book I’ve ever read, the message nearly always boils down to one thing. Love yourself. To treat yourself with kindness and compassion. To be able to look in the mirror and love who you see. And to basically act like you’re the most awesome person in the whole entire world. Because, guess what? You are!
But of course this is sometimes easier said than done, and as my heroine Paige discovers. And while she faithfully follows all the rules laid out in her self-help book, it’s not until she falls in love with someone else that she truly gets to know herself, and that’s what the real transformation takes place.
So, if you’re looking to makeover your life and don’t want to do what Paige did and travel three thousand miles across country, then here are a few things you can try from the comfort of your own home:
Love yourself.
If that seems too hard, then perhaps start by forgiving yourself. We all have things that we torture ourselves over. Like the time we embarrassed ourselves in front of our crush. Forty years ago! By forgiving yourself for something that’s in the past, you’re taking the first step to self-acceptance. You can go through all your old memories that keep coming up and one by one forgive yourself for what happened and then let the memory go.
Another thing is to treat yourself. Think about someone you dearly love. Don’t you always want to make them happy? It could be with a gift or a lovely home cooked meal, or even a compliment. However you show love to those around you, try doing it for yourself. You’ll be amazed how great it feels.
A final thing to help with your reinvention is to dream about what kind of person you long to be. Really go into the details of what the future you is like. Picture what clothes you’re wearing, what your job is, what your house looks like, who’s in the house with you. Because the more you focus on what you want, the more clarity you’ll get on how to achieve it.